How to Be the Boss No-one Quits
People don’t quit their job, they quit their boss.
Jon! You wrote about this last time!
Don’t worry, I’m not really repeating myself.
In fact, I owe you an apology. I did a little bit of a bait-and-switch last time. I wrote about how to quit your job gracefully.
This time I want to take the perspective of a leader - how do you become the sort of boss that people don’t want to quit?
There are a lot of things I could list out here, but really it boils down to two main factors, and I think to be successful in the long term, you need both.
You need vision, and you need to give a damn about your staff.
Said another way, you need to give people something to aim towards, something inspiring, and you need them to trust that you’ll get them there safely, without burning them out or treating them as ‘human resources’.
As a sidenote I really dislike that term. Human resources. What are we, just a resource to be used up and then discarded? No. Gross. People deserve to be treated with respect. No disrespect intended to HR professionals - you didn't choose the title...
If you only have vision, you will lose people along the way - the lack of psychological safety will drive people away from you.
If you only care about your staff but don’t have a destination in mind, you’ll probably go quite a long way but you’ll lose your most talented people as they often want a mission to sign up to, something bigger than themselves to believe in.
Note that I’m not talking about everything it takes to be a good leader - I’m just focusing on factors that might help with retention in your teams. I’m also not talking about many other factors at play when people leave a job, such as compensation, career progression, value alignment, work overload, etc., although I would argue that some of these could be considered under the mantle of caring about your staff.
Vision
“We choose to go to the moon. We choose to go to the moon in this decade and do the other things, not because they are easy, but because they are hard.” - John F Kennedy, September 12, 1962.
If you bring to mind the most inspiring leaders you can think of, they usually have this aspect in common. They build a compelling vision for the future and what you might to do help them achieve it. JFK managed to hit his visionary deadline just before the decade was up, in July of 1969.
Different leaders will emphasize different aspects of their vision, based on what they’re trying to achieve, but some common elements are:
Clarity - the vision must be clear and easily understood
Big and bold - the vision must be audacious
Purpose driven - there should be something about the vision that taps into a higher cause
Long-term - the example I gave above was ‘within the decade’ and usually a good vision has a long term timescale and impact
Inclusive - it’s important that people are able to see how they can be a part of it
Innovative and/or disruptive - a great vision often encourages going beyond the current status quo and finding new ways of doing things
Inspirational - the vision should inspire and motivate
Ideally a good vision clearly articulates the destination as well - a measurable and achievable goal.
The important thing is that it’s something that people can sign up to and believe in.
Special note for middle-managers: You may need to carry and communicate a vision that is not yours - it belongs to leadership higher up in the organization. This is fine - your responsibility is to ensure the effective cascade and clarity of communication. You have to carry the vision and own your team’s part in fulfilling it. You may even wish to develop your own supporting vision, that talks about how you and your team will help deliver the ‘main’ vision.
Psychological (and physical) safety
Caring
“Don’t ever mistake my silence for ignorance, my calmness for acceptance, or my kindness for weakness. Compassion and tolerance are not a sign of weakness, but a sign of strength”
- Dalai Lama
Let me start by telling you what this is not. It’s not about being soft, or weak, or being a friend instead of a boss. Being considerate and caring, and creating an environment of psychological safety, will create a working environment where people want to spend their time.
It’s actually an enabler for vision - if people feel safe they are more able to connect to their deeper motivations and to ideas bigger than themselves. Think about it - if you’re constantly scrabbling for position or to keep your job how are you possibly going to innovate or come up with ideas to be able to reach the moon?
Because I just can’t help myself from creating bullet-point lists, here are some things to consider in becoming a caring leader:
Take into consideration the whole person. Much as we assume that there is a separation between our work and home personas, realistically that isn’t the case. People need support for all aspects of their life. Checking in on how someone’s doing - and really meaning it - can make a huge difference.
Create a supportive environment. Give people good clear measurable goals and try to eliminate jockeying for position.
Support diversity, equity, and inclusion. Make sure you have diverse voices in your team and make sure they are heard.
Trust, but verify. Trust your team to do the things they are responsible for, and verify that they’re doing them.
Give and support autonomy. This doesn’t mean letting people run wild - give them good guardrails and check that people are delivering as expected.
Care about career growth. Give your team room to grow and help them find the next opportunity to step up. Make sure people have training goals that satisfy their needs as well as the needs of the business.
Watch out for burn out. If people are super excited about the vision it can be a double-edged sword. Make sure people are taking appropriate rest and breaks - remember it’s a marathon, not a sprint.
Conclusion
There are a lot of factors in being a boss that people don’t quit, but I think vision and caring are probably the biggest two. Sure, we can talk about communication skill, strategy, compensation, flexibility, work environment, and a bunch of other things but if you focus on vision and giving a damn you’ll go a long way to retaining the best talent in your team.
What do you think? Do you agree - or disagree - with this idea?
When you're ready, I offer 1:1 coaching for leaders who are looking to take their life and career to the next level. Send me an email and we'll set up a time to have a chat.
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